Wednesday, 30 December 2015

Father

On this day 31st of December, 1954 my father was born. My dad is one of few people I let in my life. I actually trust him with my problems like a son should. He is not perfect and I am not perfect. My father grew up without a mother and a bastard of a father who was an alcoholic and a gambler. He was English and I never knew him. Thank god I never knew him. Why would I want to?

My father was raised by his uncles in a little western Scottish town called Helensbourgh. Yes I am half western Scottish. My dad used to say to me as a child "Steven, the west is the best" meaning the west of Scotland is the best of Scotland. You see Edinburgh is the east coast. It's funny, I never notice his accent. I just think he has a Scottish accent but definitely not an Edinburgh accent. A lot of people from Edinburgh think I am not from Edinburgh because apparently I do not sound like i come from there. Even before I moved to the west of Scotland. But people in the west don't think I come from Edinburgh too. They say I kind of have a east/west coast accent. But not Edinburgh. 

Ask Kimmi, she is from the west and doesn't think I have a strong Edinburgh accent, my brothers, my mother have it. But not me. I guess I have subconsciously listened to my father more then I have listened to my brothers and mother? My father packed his stuff  and moved to France when he was 18, he lived in Marseille. He was a plumber and picked grapes. And actually made them into wine. He also picked oranges.

He then moved to Israel. He got thought how to use a gun for his safety. My father is also a work a holic. He was always working when I was a child. I wouldn't see him as much as I wanted too. He loved black sabbath too. My dads style as a young man would have been a hippie to be honest. He liked Bob Dylan too. When I was younger I was snooping on his stuff a found his marajouna pipe. It was strange because I never knew he smoked until I was 15. He never done it in front of us. He wasn't a big smoker anyway. Probably smoked six a week. He's not a drinker too. I have a can of beer with him at Christmas and toast a whisky together at new year. He likes his whisky at new year.

In all dad, I am happy you are still alive. These past four years have been a rollarcoaster of emotions. You're 61 today. And I am so glad you survived. I am so proud and respect the strength you showed not to let your illness win. You fought for your family when many people would have gave up, because you were in so much pain. Yes you are still getting over the trauma but you done it. You won. That's something they can never take away from you. 

Even now you are trying to help me with my problems and you are one of few who step back and take a look at how I am behaving and say, hold on that's not right. You always look out for me and make sure I am okay. You have helped me become a man. I am proud to call you my father. I used to believe that I wasn't but as soon as I moved out and met certain people, I understood the sacrifices you had made for our family.

Your partner ( my mother) is a catholic and you are Protestant. That says it all really. It's hard in Scottish/British culture for this to happen. But you see love for love, not love for religion. That tells you just what kind of man you are. Love is love.

My mother said to me when she first met you, you had hair so long it was past your arse.... I guess that's where I get my style from LOL!!

You're a world bag pipe champion, you competed alongside your uncle in the championships and won. We all know the reasons why you never taught me and my brothers and that's okay... I still respect you for that....

You're a grandad now and you're a perfect one. One day I will give you another grand daughter or maybe grandson and you will inspire them just how you've inspired me to live.

We are very simmiler, we tell it how it is, we hold nothing back. You possibly a bit more then me... Thank you for what you have done ....


 I love you dad. Happy birthday.

(My dad, far right)

Friday, 25 December 2015

Merry Christmas.

So I'm at mum and dads right now and it's a very English Christmas. Well normally we open our presents In the morning. But since mum was working last night we will open our presents late at night. Like the English do lol

Right now i am watching the movie brave. It's the most Scottish thing I have ever seen. Jacks laying on my feet in front of the fire. Dads asleep on couch lol. It's pretty sad because Andrew is spending Christmas with his family, Richard with his and I'm the only one who's doing it with my mum and dad... People have all grew up... 

Anyway back to this movie. 



Thursday, 24 December 2015

My favourite Christmas film::

Watching my favourite Christmas film...

Willie Wonka. The original one not the gay Tim burton one.

This is my child hood right here ...




Wednesday, 23 December 2015

Big development for myself.

Well this is going to be one of the most important blog post I have wrote since joining. This is going to be a very special post and I am actually happy to let my followers know and I am happy to who knows look back and read one day and think wow that's when it started going right.

Let's get one thing perfectly clear here, I am not writing this for attention, I am not writing this for sympathy or anything that might appear me as the victim. I am NOT a victim in life. I am just me. I write this because some followers and people I know deserve to know the truth. I write this because I want to look back on this as a good memory and see what type of person I was. 

Here is the thing, I was born with ADHD, I developed Cerebarl palsy, yes I have MILD cerebral palsy. I also have been diagnosed with depression, anxiety and sucidal ideation. 

But my struggle over the past few years has been accepting and living with my personality disorder. Yes I suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder and that's the last time I will say that on this blog because I am not proud of it actually I am ashamed of myself for having it... 

So Why ?

Why am I telling you all of this? 
I am telling you this because a new development has happened I have been offered not a physcologist, not medication (well I'm on medication) not any magical answer, but I have been offered dialectical behaviour therapy the gold treatment for people with this disorder. I have been told I am so lucky to be getting this. It's part of the reason why we moved because Midlothian (the region in Scotland I stay in only offers it in all of Scotland) and normally I would have to wait one year but a space opened up.

I get given a sheet for the week and write down imhowni was feeling and what triggers me off and what skills I used. I then attended therapy with other people with the same diagnoses and talk about how I was feeling. I then meet my CPN and talk about how I am. So I am grabbing this with my two hands. This is my shot. I will say goodbye to my anger, my paranoia, my avoidant behaviour, my black and white thinking, my outbursts my sadness and being on the line....

2016 is a very good year for me. I have DBT I have my driving lessons, and I have my dogs. I also have my wonderful amazing girlfriend who wants to help and my family near me. I am the only one who can make this work and only me can make myself fail. But I won't fail. It's time to grow up and it's time to be stronger and support myself emotionally and not depend on others to regulate my feelings. To those other people I am so sorry. Please forgive me and please keep hope for me. 2016 is the year I get better.

Thank you love Steven .


Christmas cards.

I have a grand total of 2 Christmas cards this year (hahaha how popular!) Nini gave me and Kim our first Christmas card and then my mum and dad gave us our second! I love getting mail :) I've sent a few out this year too. Thank you for sending them:) 

Monday, 21 December 2015

I need YOUR help:

Hello people of blog spot or blogger or skyrock, Oups sorry that's a French blog page I was on when I was 15.. I wrote it in French... Anyway I really need your help. You see I want to blog, talk about stuff, because I joined this site to look back on my life. I feel I do, do stuff. But I don't want to write about when I went to the dentist today. I mean it's cool but no one wants to know when I spat into a cup and had a 49 yr old male touch my tounge.... Does anyone have any suggestions what to write about? Plus my English is terrible. No joke, I can't construct a sentence or essay for shit.  So I think what's the point? I will just confuse people... Right now I'm watching Dynamo he's a magiciton.. He's bloody good... Let's post a random picture now and go to bed. I'm up early tomorrow to see Joanne. 
Ah, Mila's Christmas presents. I bought her these today. Andrew and Kirsty don't have a DVD player but they do have a laptop. So it will be able to play. I got Mila this because it is important for her to understand and learn about her feelings in her head and heart. I want her to always remember she has feelings. And to understand them. So I don't see the DVD as a one off buy. I put thought into my presents for her I mean I always do but maybe extra thought? The teddy learns her name too. .. Here is some info on it

Bye

Fuckers.

This is very accurate


Saturday, 19 December 2015

4K

So I have a 4K TV and I just paused it... This is what it paused on lol 
Holy shit!

Friday, 18 December 2015

Sad.

Kimmi just left, feel so sad and had a lump in my throat walking away from the train. She cried, I was crying as I walked away.... I love you darling.

I took this for you:) 

Wednesday, 16 December 2015

Song of the week.

I effing love this track. It is so beautiful. The track is called 
Tale of a haunted banker by Christopher young. Go listen 
It's beautiful.

Michael lives on!!

So I heard they are making a new series of prison break! Oh sweet Jesus! I can't wait! Seriously. I love prison break. I remember the last episode I watched Kim was like, "where's Michael, he's dead isn't he? I'm like he's not dead! Shut up you don't know this With tears LOL!!" But yeah I'm a big prison break fan! Really excited for the new series can not wait! Michael is so smart. Linc is so cool and Sarah is amazing! Michael is alive!

Winter days..

Writings- not sure where to write these, I like to creative write. It's really fun to explore the doors and caves of your soul to give something you can look back on. If anyone see's this. Well I'm letting you see a part of me. I guess I'm lucky to express my feelings through my finger tips and hand. The secret? Never use it for financial or attention seeking gain. I only write at the right times. I never put pressure on myself. I don't sell songs. I have wrote a song though for Kimmi's band. Anyway please don't hate these lyrics. I just found them laying around lol

And the winter nights became so clear I held on to my deepest fears. When the winter days became so near I reconstructed the chance in my head. I pushed so hard and I climbed so near. My heart was left with guilt and fear. The reasons I ran away from the night. Was to follow my hope and that star so bright. I'm writing this alone and cold. I'm writing this with so much hope. That everything will come so near. The only thing that I have to fear is losing my head and running from tears. Yes I pushed all away and spoke about me night and day. Yes I pushed so many people down I dependened on oxygen from my ground.

So this ones for the people I hurt, learn the truth and that's a must. I feel the pain of those winter nights so come ahead and judge me on plight. I will take my fears away and I will grow who seems to say. A shine of light will flick away, believe me when I say. I'm truer to my heart and truer to my mind. I've left my demands all behind. My past may react and that could be true. Let's play a game who's behind you? I will take a jab and leave a punch. I will use my cureage to end this rush. Because the way I treated you in the past.......it was a disgrace.... That will hang over and always last.


Thai curry.

Well that was amazing what I had for dinner.
Kimmi made us a Thai curry with coconut rice. And got us ice cream.. Ben and jerries! Was like an angel danced on my tounge while listening to classical music and drowning out cats. Amazing...

Kimmi leaves on Friday. As I have said... It will be hard but yeah I can do two weeks. I have football on Saturday. Last Saturday hibs scored in the last minute to make it 1-1. I have been to around 10 hibs games this season and have NOT seen them lose. People are saying we can win the league. It's exciting... 

Monday I have the dentist. And Tuesday I see Joanne. I still need to send my Christmas cards out. Damn, I can't do early mornings. I suck-___-

Looking to go and travel somewhere with Kim for a holiday, I had some places in mind. I wanna visit a cold country like Poland. I hate being too warm. I'm Scottish I'm used to being cold. I like cold country's. They get me. 

I've been getting a lot of views from Russia. So privet Russians. To everyone feel free to leave a comment. I hate talking about my days really. I'm thinking of writing about all sorts of stuff. Possibly Scottish Gaelic. But hey, cimar à thà thú my Scottish Gaelic is shit. I don't even speak it. I'm learning a few languages at the moment. Not very well. But yeah I probably always say this but I feel something is missing from my life. I can't put my finger on it. Well kinda. I have Kimmi, my family, Jack. Just something.

Anyway I gotta prepare the coffee

Bye

Fuckers

Plot twist the coffee prepares me, KURWA!
That was last Friday by the way. I ain't no alkie who drinks at 5am

Tuesday, 15 December 2015

Christmas cards

I wrote my Christmas cards out yesterday... Why? Why would I do this? The one thing I hate most? Hand writing skills... They suck to be honest! That's why I hate writing cards. But you know I LOVE getting letters. Even bills ! I just have always loved it since a was a wee laddie. I wrote tae Scott, Nini, fabi, my uncle Richard and his boyfriend Bryan and the horrible polish neighbours downstairs! Oh and my auntie Anne. So oh and Kevin and Pete, well Kimmi did but I signed my name cause they're our mutual friends. They're nice.

Kimmi's away to Ayrshire on Friday... For two weeks. Two weeks of no Kimmi, no Scottish west coast accent to hear... :(

But hey at least il be near my family right?  Still going to suck without the one you love near you... Hmm.. I'm going Christmas shopping on the 21st.
It was princess Mila's first birthday last Saturday. We got her my little pony DVD and shark tale DVD and a puppy dog that teaches baby's numbers, colours and singing. It has three levels. So that was nice. But Kirsty's family was there all day so I didn't have a chance to give it to her. So I am sure I will see her soon..

I renewed my bus pass and am on the waiting list for DBT. They accepted me. So for now I meet up with Joanne every two weeks or so and talk. It's kinda like a preparation dbt session.. Yeah I'm going to be with a group of strangers.... And then the week after I go in for a one to one. So that should be jolly :D.... Not LOL!

I've been to therapy before, I had it in Ayr, that's a story for another time. Look st me spililing out info like a whore in a cowshed.. Well how else was milk discovered. The person was obviously a whore.

Oh may I add I really need a fucking haircut, however I'm not sure what cut to go for. It's bothering me right now. 

Also have you guys checked out still game yet? It's really good! I'm going to post a video soon about it. Does anyone want a tour of Dalkeith? the small village I live in. It had Christmas lights and the relflection comes through the window and shines on my tv (which is off) and it looks like Santa is shitting. 
"Merry Christmas Dalkeith"

By the way. The people here the locals are very defensive. If you say they're from Edinburgh they get angry LOL! Kim was like they sound like they come from Edinburgh. Also they like Edinburgh sport teams, use Edinburgh words. And work in Edinburgh.... But no, not from Edinburgh... Even though they are 2 miles outside of Edinburgh. Yeah, to me you're from Edinburgh Dalkeith. Deal with it. 

Right am going back to bed because busy day tomorrow. Bye bye

Fuckers

Tuesday, 8 December 2015

Yum.


Hot chocolate at winter!

Christmas is soon!!!!!
Two tea spoons of sugar, five tea spoons of hot chocolate and cream, add water first then sugar then chocolate then cream... Result???

Oh... And a sprinkle of hot chocolate!


Fuckers.

Good idea or bad?



Who has time to clean bowls LOL! Got Kimmi's breakfast ready for tomorrow morning! If this works we will be so happy lol!

Monday, 7 December 2015

Oups...

Well, I made a mistake LOL! Turns out that huge gas bill? I never knew you're supposed to give a readings to the company (a few numbers on the gas machine) to them every three months not once a month. So that's the reason it is high. So they will continue taking £25 and not £42 happy days!

Me and Kim went to my mum and dads today. I was helping Kim all night with her college portfolio, so didn't get much sleep. Anyway I'm trying to relax right now. 

Every cloud has a silver lining? Well you know, it's winter, it's cold I thought fuck it why not just turn the heating on in bedroom all night so I have and will continue to do so until it's not so cold! Lol

I have so many cards to send out. Fabi, Scott, Nini, my uncle and a few more people. Oh and the neighbours even though I hate them! 

Going to watch some breaking bad now. Bye!

Saturday, 5 December 2015

How in the name of fuck is this possible?!

Very confused and angry. I was going through my emails and have been up all night trying to wrap my head round this idiotic e-mail. Believe me I tried sleeping but am so god damn annoyed.

So I pay £25 a month for Gas. I am very protective with my money. So is Kim. Reduced meat shopping (you can freeze it and it's cheap) making sure we always get the best deal for us, Internet and what not.

Anyway we pay £25 a month on gas which is good because we only use it when we need to. Hot water and radiators. Basically to heat a room. Plus we have another flat or apartment to you Americans reading, bellow us, and they have a shop below them. So since the heat rises we get heat anyway... 

So basically going through my email I get this horrible fucking email....

First of all, I use little gas, so why does the price need to be re arranged to £17.00 more? (Take note I have the app on my phone and can see how much gas I use) second of all I have managed to save £42 from un used gas. Third why am I even getting charged £80 ? I was told if I pay through a bill no service charge and why in gods name is it 80?! Thirdly I pay £25 a month, if I decided not to use but still pay £25 I still get charged for not using gas?! How the fuck is that fair? I only use the gas for hot water anyway. So moral of the story? Make sure you don't save up your un used gas money towards nice things ?! I feel like a fucking slave!! As soon as it is 8am I'm calling them and giving them abuse! How dare they! Surely am not the only one who thinks this is wrong? Surely ?! Fucking fuds..

Fuckers!


Friday, 4 December 2015

Three years.

I was really bad smoking cigarettes. I could smoke 60 a day. But normally 40...

Then my dad got diagnosed... I had to give up.. A few months a go he told me he is really proud of me for giving up. 

I love my e cig. It's really helped. It look cool too lol 

Shopping!

So not this Saturday but next is my niece Mila's one year birthday. So I'm looking to reckless spent, um I mean spend money on her to get her a good present! So that's what I shall do today with Kim. Kim's at college right now and I'm getting ready for the dentist. It's been so cold here recently. And even snowing. But it doesn't stay on the ground. 

Oh by the way. As many of you might know. The U.K. Has decided to bomb Syria. Even though Scotland voted against it. And all the Scottish MPs voted against. But hey whatever England wants England gets. So if I get bombed blame England! I actually travel to Edinburgh everyday. Edinburgh is three miles away from me. My mum and dads house is closer to me then Edinburgh town centre is to them. Technically they are in Edinburgh. But only just. 

As for the bombings? I'm all for it. As long as it's actual targets and not innocent people. But then again I'm not because the money could be spent on food, housing. But hey like I said whatever people in London want people in London get. Just another reason to vote for independence.

Can't wait to cook this mother fucker. Scots salmon is so good!!!!!

Bye

Fuckers

Thursday, 3 December 2015

Old home has been sold!

Goodbye old house! I won't miss your coldness, your gappy Windows, your horrible carpets, your ugly bathroom, your burnt Window ledges, your horrible boiler room, your unstable thin door, your ugly kitchen and most of all the crazy fucking neighbours who had party's from I kid you not SEVEN PM, until ELEVEN AM the next day!!

If you want to see my old house feel free

Be warned its ugly! 

http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-32391437.html

Fuckers.

Tuesday, 1 December 2015

Mess... I'm the best kind of mess.

How will I stop, when will I start learning. Will I come clean to say that I'm wrong I'm the best kind of mess, I'm the best kind of mess, I'm the best kind of mess. 

Monday, 30 November 2015

Just out

Just finished my appointment: went well. Back on the 14th. Really hard to talk about certain things. And it's scary: been up all night was so frightened. Need a sleep lol. 

Hmm..

Funny how when you are on a tire swing and the rope snaps. You can't play on it anymore. But the person on it was ignoring you when you asked him to hang out on the spiny fucking thing (forgot what it's called) but as soon as his tire swing breaks (up with his girlfriend) he wants to talk and hang out!! I won't be used in that way. Fuck him. This is why I prefer dogs to people. -_-. Happy fucking Monday people. Not slept. Have an appointment. Worried, scared, anxious. I hate appointments. Happy Saint Andrews day. Scotland is the best country in the world for whisky (spelt with no fucking e) and haggis. And TVs and phones, and rubber for the tired and penicillin. What else did we invent? Football, golf... Britain..... Ew.

Bye

Fuckers!

Alba gu bràth.

Friday, 27 November 2015

Scottish Comedy.

So this post won't be in Scots, but I just wanted you guys to know that one of my favourite TV shows is available on the British and American Netflix. The program is called Still Game. It's very popular in Scotland and I mean very popular. It's about the lives of two old men and they are bad asses! It shows you Scotland. So if your interested give it a go. You'll laugh I promise lol

I'm watching it right now!

Haha
Seriously give it ago! 

Fuckers.

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Waiting for a bus and random thoughts.

Just waiting for a bus right now. Been at the dentist. Went pretty well:)

Actually i have been waiting 12 weeks for my provisional driving license. Basically a license to allow me to start driving lessons. You see as I have said I want to become a dog trainer. I want to work one to one with people and need my own car to drive to clients.. But anyway basically it's against the law not to mention medical problems so they are asking my doctor if I'm okay to drive.. Which I am. I think... Lol. 

Also I done the budgeting yesterday for Christmas and birthdays. It's Mila's birthday on the 12th of December. I don't know what to get her. I wanted to get her a mini mouse bedframe but can't because she will need a special bed due to her medical problems. So anything with mini mouse. I've decided I want to always get her a mini mouse thing. I visited before moving to Dalkeith and got her a mini mouse teddy and she loved it. Then we have Kim's brothers birthday on the 26th. Then my dads on Hogmanay. And then there's Christmas presents for all... Basically we have the money but it's so hard to think of Christmas presents. I got Kim an early present a little pink laptop which she loved and she got me Fifa lol

I will make an appointment with the doctor about my foot. It really hurts and I don't even know what I done to it. I think it's nerve damage... 

Oh! Oh! Also I have been doing movember! Not shaving for a whole month and I fucking hate it. I actually started mid October lol ! It's itchy and annoying Kim hates it too xD I can't wait to shave in December. Also I've been watching old British comedy's. If you have time watch the comedy Harry Enfield and chums. It was my favourite as a wee laddie 

By the way my next blog post will be in scots. Fuck the English language! 
Gonna go now

Bye!

My bus came !
Fuckers.

Have you ever been so scared...

Hey guys long time no talk. So where have I been? No where idiot I've just been too lazy to update. I've also had the cold for around two weeks now... Also i think I have damaged nerves in my foot because I can't seem to put any weight on it or move it for four days now.. Anyway. 

Boy do I have a story for you guys. About two nights ago I was terrified. It was three in the morning. I was in bed with Kimmi. We couldn't sleep. I'm spooning Kim. And I laugh and say haha look. There's a shadow on the wall and it looks like a skull... But then the light blinked about three times. I thought well the window from our bedroom shows an alleyway. And there are lights there maybe they are broke. I get up to check and I can see the roof opesit us.. The roof opesit us is the roof of the Royal bank of Scotland. Yes a bank. So.. I look outside my window. ... I appear to see a bald old man crouching on his knees. Shining a torch into our bedroom window..:. I quickly duck, get my phone while hiding to make sure he doesn't see me on the phone I tell Kimmi to stay down. She thought it was an old man trying to commit suicide... She saw a man jump from a crane in Glasgow at night once..: she didn't understand since I was so frantic.. I called the police told them what happened.. Ten minutes gone I get no call back... So we call the police again. The police operator told us they had snifer dogs on the scene and it was workmen. Eh?! Workmen at three in the morning Why were they shineing a torch in my window ?! I acted calmly and just called the police straight away. This is why you need a dog in your home... And that's my two cents.

Have you got a scary story? Leave a comment


Fuckers.

Sunday, 8 November 2015

Well that's unexpected.

Hmm. I don't know how to say this and honestly? I don't want to.. So I'm not going to. I don't have to say anything I don't want too... But holy holy HOLY mother fucking shite baws. 

I'm in disgust, utter disgust. I really am ashamed. Not angry just shame. I can't actually believe this is happening... 

We tried talking to you one to one last year, remember? You said it was the best idea! You said that you agreed? And then this happens.. 

This is going to happen for such all the wrong fucking reasons, not the reasons that it's meant to happen. The worst thing is, you take no responsibility for it. You just go living your life like normal now, bossed around... A very special person said to me once "everything has a consequence, everything and there is no point lieing, because the truth will always come out in the end" 

This blog post is aimed at someone, but they don't have blogger, so I'm using this to rant... But seriously this is NOT a joke. I am deeply ashamed and hurt at what these people have done. Why? Because it's the principle and like I've just said the consequences... Holy fucking shite!!!!!

Even Kim is angered! I need to go to sleep now, I have an appointment at the doctors ... I have an assessment for DBT. Diletical behaviour therapy.. Funny I was waiting almost two years for it in Ayr. In Dalkeith they offer me it straight away..

Well good night blogger. Thanks for letting me use you as a punching bag... 

Fuckers.

Ps I know it is fucking creepy as hell. But I took this photo of a random couple on the bus because I thought it looked lovely, true love lol
Bye!!

Fuckers!

Friday, 30 October 2015

Jacky Vincent leaves Falling In Reverse.

I've just found out one of my favourite guitarists has left my favourite band falling in reverse. I am sad but excited to see where this could take him and falling in reverse. He lived the dream. He actually applied to join the band through MySpace in 2008. I remember being on stickam with him and chatting with him in 2008. Before falling in reverse were signed. He is a major talent and is only around 25. He has a big career ahead of him. So good luck to him. I'm looking forward to seeing how falling in reverse will cope. I think they will do well. You see  Jackys solos were kinda simmiler all the time and a solo does not define a band. The musicians do. Good luck to falling in reverse and jacky 


Wednesday, 28 October 2015

Why can't I sleep?

It's 3:15 AM. I am up at 11. I have places to go, people to see. But honestly can't sleep a wink.... In other news I have stopped biting my nails.. Yep... It's true. they are long... I don't want them too long cause I'm not a women. Plus I've never broken a nail but I hear it hurts. Music doesn't help, counting sheep doesn't help.. Hm... I am so busy and wish I could sleep. I swear it's that coffee I had at 11 yesterday. It just keeps me up. But I've been busy all day. I can't tell you what. It's a surprise. But you'll be shocked.. I like surprises.. This week has went fast. I've had a weird week. Christmas is soon. Savings and presents. If you don't get a good enough gift for someone they hate you.. Well deep down they do but won't admit it... Kim's going to her mums for Christmas.. I'm.. Well I don't know yet. I'd actually like to spend it alone. No worrys. I actually hate Christmas come to think of it. Tourists, cold, no snow and just rain. I almost  flooded the house today... Oups.. Now that I've got some random shit of my chest maybe I can sleep. Off to bed! Night 

Fuckers 

Pretty good deal on the fish. Was £15, got it for £3 and put it in the freezer. I like salmon too. Anyone know what I can do with the head? It's freaky. Oh I know! Instead of feeding ducks we can feed the seagulls on my enemy's car bonnets :D at 7AM!!!!!!

Moi, j'suis fou, mais la vie n'est pas vrai! J'adore mes livers<3 j'adore le soille

A bientot.

Cons.

Wednesday, 21 October 2015

63 things that annoy Scottish people

Enjoy!! Haha!!

It's all true! Yep!

http://www.buzzfeed.com/hilarywardle/thats-not-a-tunnocks-teacake#.dwXnz35zl

Thursday, 15 October 2015

Monday, 12 October 2015

Gym days.

I I I haven't updated because I've had something on my mind. But there seems to be a light at the end of the tunnel and hopefully things will be good now. Who says praying doesn't work :D

So Kimmi has her week off college and has went to her mothers in Irvine. So I've been well a bit lonely? I've just been going to the gym. Doing my workout and in a jacuzzi and sauna! Lol then I visited my parents on the way home

Okay I will admit it... I borrowed some towels from the gym.... My parents were angry at me and offended I think I didn't ask them? Next thing I know my mum brings in a giant bag of about 10 towels LOL! All new! 

I've been missing Kim but I don't wanna disturb her, she hasn't seen her family for months and I don't want to introude (is that how you spell it?)

Yesterday as I was going to the bus stop I heard a guy singing rise like a phenix and managed to record it LOL!

But as for the gym it is helping but I'm still sore after words... I still go and push through the pain barrier.... 

Have some pics

There was a giant spider at my mum and dads house... I said to my dad, set it free, he rufused ! Lol

Oh I forgot to say that as I got the bus home my  mum walked me with Jack and he refused to move only when the bus turned the corner and started howling for me... My mum was shocked lol ! 

Anyway gonna start dinner... 

Bye

Fuckers 



Thursday, 8 October 2015

Hope over fear, the video!

Here is the video's i managed to take. i added them all up it's long but i thought it would be cool to watch :D enjoy !


Hope over fear pictures and an important Plus more.

So these are the pictures that i took for the hope over fear rally i went to a couple of weeks back here they are in order enjoy !



































And the plus more?

I will be uploading all the videos i took into one big video... stay tuned


FUCKERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS:D:D:D